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September, 2005 Greetings, Welcome to your fr*ee monthly e-newsletter about living the solution...not the problem! Written and published by: Dr. Toby Silverton & Dr. Bev McLagan Sent to subscribers in Canada, U.S., U.K., the Middle East and Asia. Many thanks to everyone who forwards the newsletter on. We grow through your recommendations so please keep up the good work and forward this newsletter to a few friends and colleagues. In This Issue: The morning didn’t start out all that well. More aptly, it just started really early when Rolly (19 ½ yr old cat) was sick at 3:45 am. OK, that’s the start of the day. Tea and biscuits later I figure I’ll get a start on the newsletter. Oh, did I mention that we are on holidays. Well, a couple of weeks away from “the office” to relax, regroup, and reenergize. However, neither snow, nor sleet…will keep the newsletter away! The topic seemed on target for what our clients are talking about and we are all looking for, ways to make stress less of a prominent detail in everyday life. How big stressors can feel in all our lives, or how much the accumulation of everyday hassles can feel draining .I unwittingly delivered myself a wake-up call before I grabbed my laptop. I switched CNN on just to see what was going on in the world (an early morning habit) only to hear the ever worsening news following hurricane Katrina. The water is still rising, there is no food or water or shelter, still uncertain numbers of fatalities, thousands of animals lost, and New Orleans is almost non-existent. After a somber and soulful moment of quiet tears, I wondered how I could possibly write about dealing with stress. So I’m continuing this with an attitude of deep gratefulness that I have the luxury of sharing with you some ideas about minimizing the stress in our lives, well acutely aware of the perspective such disasters as the hurricane put everything into. That said, I couldn’t not say it, it really is important for all of us to stay on top of the buildup of stress in our lives ‘cause the ultimate outcome of chronic tension and stress is burnout. What we all want to aim for is an optimal level of stress. Yes, Virginia there is such a thing! The optimal level of stress keeps us on our toes, moving forward, achieving more in our lives and yet able to relax at will. Visualize the good old fashioned “normal curve” – low end, no stress equals boredom; middle of the “bulge” of the curve equals optimal stress; high flat end of the curve means we are, well, flattened by our stress. So here are 3 solutions that you can incorporate into daily living that will help keep you balancing on the optimal point of the curve. 1. We can’t say it enough times, but I dare say it again…time management. It’s true. Feeling in control of your time, therefore a good chunk of your life means less stress. Here is one area where the lowest common denominator works. Seems like the fancier the time management system gets, the less likely we are to continue to use it. So experiment with various ways and find one that works for you. I admit, I’m still with the pen and paper kind of daytimer, but it seems that what kind of system works for you also depends on what type of learner you are. If you are a real visual learner, electronics may not be the way to go. For you parents out there, with September comes school, plus activities again. Now is a great time to begin teaching your kids time management skills. This is a gift that keeps on giving. It’s just one you may never get thanked for because it will become a natural skill to them, lucky kids. Try simple “colour blocking” give each one a blank calendar of their own, let them pick out coloured highlighters; one for school, studying/homework time, activities, play time…then colour in their calendar. They will know at a glance what their week shapes up like, and so will you, and that adds up to less stress! Truth be known, colour blocking works great for adults too. It’s quick, simple, and visual. One glance at the page and you know if it is a work day or a play day! 2. The best stress buster is laughter! Laughter truly is the best medicine for stress. Our brain simply cannot maintain the stress response while it is laughing – go ahead, try it, I double dare you! Do you know that kids laugh 400 times a day on average and us poor adults only about 25 times a day? I ask you, who’s having more fun? It’s a crying shame that with adulthood comes an overdose of seriousness! Sure, adult stresses are bigger (to us), responsibilities are more, we understand global warming and all that other yucky stuff – but, hey, we also have the advantage of adulthood that we have developmentally reached the stage of being able to take a different perspective on most things. Ok, there are those few that haven’t, but most of us… So like changing the direction of your page on the computer, see if you can crank your world view to a slightly different angle. Sometimes the worst everyday annoyances appear rather amusing if you give them a different slant. Maybe we should just learn from the experts who laugh 400 times a day and switch on the cartoon channel! 3. Number 3 is my favourite! Being an animal devotee I own-up to a certain bias, but facts support the health benefits of having animals in our lives. Here are some facts in case any of you skeptics out there doubt that our furry or feathered cohabitors of the planet are good for us. Studies of elderly people find that those with animals to care for have lower blood pressure, are less depressed and have higher self-esteem. Medication costs in nursing homes go down when pets are allowed. Therapeutic animals (trained dogs for example) are routinely used in hospital settings (we happen to know a wonderful golden retriever named Palo who brought many a moment of love to seriously ill patients, bravo Palo!), animals such as dogs and dolphins are used as part of treatment for children suffering from autism or severe trauma to name just a couple of instances. Of course, equine therapy (horseback riding) has been used for years to help strengthen those with disorders that affect muslces and movement, not to mention the self-confidence benefits that come from riding a horse. Still skeptical? In 2000 the American Heart Association studied stockbrokers (now there’s a stressed out bunch if I’ve ever seen one) and found that those who had dog or cat companions experienced a lowering of the stress response that contributes to high blood pressure. If you don’t feel you can fit an animal into your personal world, think about other ways of gaining the health boosting benefits animals bring. The SPCA loves volunteers to spend time just playing with and loving those in the shelter. Other shelters offer the opportunity, not only to visit, but to foster parent. Try Forgotten Felines or Richmond Animal Protection Society. There is even a refuge for neglected, abandoned, or abused reptiles. Ok, it’s not my first pick, but somebody out there loves green! Need something even more simple, just go to the park, find some squirrels to watch, sit back and laugh at their antics. Instant stress release. Note: forget time management here! So, have we convinced you? Stress management is life management. Figure out what works for you and do more of it. Keep it simple. Listen to your body it’s the best teacher. Your body get’s it. Stress response or relaxation response? Which will it be? For me… I’m back on vacation! Till next month... Toby & Bev
You are free to use material from Live the Solution!® in whole or in part, as long as you include complete attribution including our website and email link. The copyright notice should read: "By Toby Silverton, PhD. and Bev McLagan, PhD. of Silverton McLagan Coaching. Contact: coach@livethesolution.com. To unsubscribe or change your email address, just go to www.livethesolution.com/lwiezine.html Did you enjoy receiving Live the Solution? If you did, please forward it to your friends and associates. We would like to hear from you, email us your comments and ideas. T: 604-241-0810(PT) or E: coach@livethesolution.com. Visit our website at www.livethesolution.com. |
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