June, 2007: Why can’t we be just like that Great Dane puppy?

Written and published by: Dr. Toby Silverton & Dr. Bev McLagan
                                      Silverton McLagan Coaching

Personal Reflections

We were driving through town the other day when we witnessed an unusual sight…a truly unique being. You have to admit it’s unusual these days to find any being that is not afraid to march to their own drummer.

We first looked on in amazement, burst out laughing with joy, then thought, “if only we could all be so blissfully unaware of others”. There he was a whopping big Great Dane puppy proudly out on a walk with a pink fuzzy baby dangling from his mouth. He was totally unconcerned with all the stares of passerbys, totally oblivious that he was in the poshy shopping district with his “baby”, totally unaware that he was the size of a small pony!

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could all be so free to just be who we are?

What are we thinking about?

To be happy, successful, and to find a sense of equilibrium or balance in your life it is essential you know, like and trust yourself. You are seriously wasting energy when you insist on living in a state of disconnect from what you really want and who you really are. It’s not hard to figure out our strengths and gifts, but when we do, we have to find the courage to trust that inner message. It takes far too much energy to keep the truth at bay. So our mantra round here is “Truth rises” and it counts for the truth about who you are.

First step in truly knowing who you are is to accept what came with the hard drive. That’s right, there is a core you that arrived on earth from that very first breath and it’s not going to change. In one of your moments of truth, ask yourself “what parts of me as an adult are just like I was as a kid?” Some aspects of our personality are innate and we need to embrace them not fight them. Wondering what those are, well things like being an extrovert or an introvert, creativity, intellect, humour, or sensitivity among others. Science is still discovering what comes already loaded.

Uncovering your core self is just the beginning. It’s a good beginning ‘cause when we accept ourselves we stop apologizing for who we are and expecting things of ourselves that simply won’t fly. Then comes time, life experiences, life shocks, aging, relationships, these all play a part in who you are today. Some of these learned aspects of yourself have added clarity to how you see yourself and others have clouded your focus.

So what’s important about all this? Glad you asked. We translate all we believe about ourselves into our everyday life via the decisions we make, the goals we plan, how we communicate with others, and how we manage our energy and time. It’s all there in our everyday world: in our relationships, career, health, and even in our financial strength.

One of the biggest hurdles clients face is acknowledging their strengths and their unique gifts. Far too often our energy and soul is spent traversing the ups and downs of life only to arrive at a viewpoint and forget what we were on the lookout for! We stand there short of breath and fail to take in the vista.

We all know where the sparklers are in our lives, we just hesitate to light them, we forget what it was we were looking for or fear what we will find when we see it. After all, what if you really “find yourself”, that special view of yourself, what would your life become? What decisions would you have to make? If you hide who you truly are from yourself you will end up on some mountain path simply going up and down. When you discover and believe in the truth of who you are and what you want you will end up on the path that you were destined to find.

Our most pressing life task is to stay as faithful to our self-truth as possible. Be courageous and be uniquely you: know your belief system; stay true to your values; take chances to discover what truly brings you joy and satisfaction. That’s the message this month.

And when your confidence in being the true you falters or you find yourself worrying about what others might think – remember the big Great Dane puppy walking along the street with his pink fuzzy baby dangling from those huge jaws blissfully ignorant of all the stares and chuckles of passer-bys. Now that’s confidence!

Building solutions

• List 5 adjectives that described you as a kid and that you can still proudly own as an adult.

• What deep life values inform the daily decisions you make? Here’s a chance to find some alignment.

• List 2 adjectives about yourself that you want to delete from your self-definition.

• What Truth about yourself are you avoiding? At what cost?

• On your daily “to do” list, starting now, make sure you add one thing each day that truly reflects who you are: train for that marathon, plant that exotic rose, write the first line of that novel you dream of, take an extra hour to make believe with the kids, sign up for singing lessons, begin to meditate…

• Find a quote that reminds you to be yourself, regardless of circumstances, place it where you can readily see it and read it everyday.  

Till next month, Embrace being you ‘cause …it’s all about attitude…it’s all about life!

© 2003-2007 Silverton McLagan Coaching. All Rights Reserved

Resources – quick links to check out resources
(Clicking on the red underlined words allows you to instantly purchase all books online, without leaving your chair!)

The Happy Introvert. A wild and crazy guide for celebrating your true self | Canada | United States | United Kingdom

Self Matters. Creating Your Life From the Inside Out
| Canada | United States | United Kingdom

Letting Go of the Person You Used To Be. Lessons on Change, Loss and Spiritual Transformation | Canada | United States | United Kingdom

Secrets You Keep from Yourself. How to Stop Sabotaging Your Happiness.
| Canada | United States | United Kingdom

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